Depression.

DSCN5317  DSCN5317

Well, I haven’t written a post in what seems forever to me. My mind is quite blank. Not active, quite sluggish. There really aren’t any thoughts coming into it except depressing thoughts. I don’t want to write. I have not much to say anyway. I am tired and achy all over my body. I have a sense of dread all the time. My thoughts are quiet, so is my speech. I cry very readily. I have no interest in much of anything. Well, what do you know! I find myself in the middle of a depression. Though not severe, still dulling, still well, depressing. A marked change from my normal state of being which is interested in everything, very vocal, ideas coming out by the dozens. This depressed way of being is boring and sad and sort of useless.

I am still cooking dinner, still going to Zumba and it is still FUN! Thank goodness for small favors. In fact, if Zumba stops being fun, call the EMT’s haha.

Just wanted to write about what it feels like to be in a depression, for people who might be in one or families of people who might be in a depression.

It isn’t fun. Although luckily, at this stage, it isn’t too painful. I am going to see my doctor on Friday. Let’s see if he has any magic tricks in his little black bag. I hope so, because I don’t want this thing to get more severe and out of control. That’s a funny thing about me, I don’t like suffering more than I have to.

7 thoughts on “Depression.

  1. You know that whole ‘dance like nobody’s watching’ thing? Well, I think sometimes it’s good to write like nobody’s reading too. It’s good to write stuff down and then along the way, you support others and they support you too. if zumba stops being fun, phone your shrink 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Because you recognize when you’re in the spiral you can work to control it. I know this state all too well. People like you and i have a blessing because we are in tune with our thoughts. I wish you peace today, tomorrow and forever and know that we understand

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thinking of you, honey! I hope that on Friday your doctor can definitely work some special magic. You’ve responded so well to med adjustments in the past, and I’m hoping that can happen again after your appt. Let us know how it goes, please….much love, beautiful!!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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