So, I have met the demons from my life and faced them square on. I have learnt about my inner child, about reparenting, about basically getting over my PTSD from the past, and about desensitizing my fight or flight response, basically about moving on and living my life in a happy, enjoyable, productive way. When one has been through trauma like I have, one’s fight or flight response is activated by things that a normal person’s would never be. Normally, a fight or flight response is elicited when someone is in mortal danger, such as if a lion is about to sink its teeth into them. People like me, who’ve had trauma as children, and who have lived in conditions that seemed like life or death to a child, well our fight or flight is elicited by much less serious occurrences. We react to much less severe things like someone else would to life threatening things. The thing to do for us is to desensitize our fight or flight. So we don’t try to use a bazooka to kill a fly, we need to calm down and remember we have a fly swatter! Basically, I need to calm down, meditation, yoga, exercise, music, “talking to my inner child”, whatever it takes to not get the bazooka out unless I really am faced with a lion. And even then, I, the real me, would hate to kill a lion. Oooops, I’m rambling, but I hope you know what I mean 🙂
So, all these things have happened in the past few weeks. Have all my problems evaporated? No. Am I stronger and more capable of handling my issues and my life? Yes, yes I am. I was always strong, but now I choose to move on from the past, it happened, it wasn’t very pretty, but it is over, and I am ready to live my life without its shadow blocking out the sun.
So there it is and here we go, living life, laughing, celebrating that we are alive!