Life

As s person with a mood disorder, needless to say this has been an extremely difficult few days. First, the anniversary of my sweet little brother’s passing then my very beloved uncle’s passing away. It’s been very, very difficult indeed. Interspersed among those awfully sad things, my 28th wedding anniversary and in a few days my birthday… Life imitates life. What is one to do but mourn the sad occasions and celebrate the happy ones. Of course, from now on, my uncle’s anniversary will fall a day before my wedding anniversary, in addition to the anniversary of my dearest brother’s passing. 

Maybe I’ll just stop celebrating my birthday and wedding anniversary. Speaking of wedding anniversaries, my uncle and my aunt were married for 63 years!! How beautiful and now, how sad. Just can’t get away from it, this sadness. This life, full of such lovely things and such awful things. I am trying to look at how fortunate we were to have my brother, even though for such a short time. Also, of course, I count myself as exceptionally lucky to have had my extraordinary uncle and his loving presence in my life. I saw him in January, when I’d visited Islamabad. He was aged, but in perfect health then. I am so glad I went to visit him. Life is so precarious. We must make the most of it. We must tell the people we love that we do indeed love them. We must live happily, enjoying every moment. The nature of “precariousness” is we never know when it will all come to an end. So carpe diem, and eat drink and be merry for tomorrow…

12 thoughts on “Life

  1. I know this awful combination of events well. My parents anniversary was 3/21, my mother died on 4/2, and her birthday was 4/8. When she died, I was in an abusive marriage, so I dredge up those feelings from when my husband demanded I come home from the hospital just 10 minutes before she died. That period is also the vernal equinox, such a beautiful time of year. My mom died about 28 years ago from heart disease, she was relatively young. This year I tried to simply focus on the positive aspects of her life/personality, and it worked pretty well. So I strongly suggest that you keep celebrating your birthday and anniversary; then celebrate the lives of those two wonderful people. It will take time for the grieving to lessen, and then it becomes a little easier to change the focus of your memories. It took me 28 years to figure that one out!

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