Recently, my friend “A” and I met for coffee. She is a part of a book club that decided to go to a movie without taking her schedule into account. Consequently, she couldn’t go. So she was feeling bad about being left out. I had gone through something like this many months ago, some people I know had decided to make a group video. Although I was part of this group, they did not ask me to be in the video. I was feeling left out because of this. I had spoken to my brother about my situation months earlier, and he had said not to wallow in self pity. He recommended that I simply get in touch with these people about including me for the video and tell them the reasons why I really belonged in it. I was going to do that, but the video project fell through. So I decided if there was ever a situation like this again, instead of feeling sorry for myself and feeling justifiably outraged and pitiful at the same time, I would contact people and let them know my feelings.
So when my friend “A” told me about her situation, I was sort of ready. I listened to her and told her exactly what my brother had told me, i.e. to not wallow in self pity because someone didn’t include her, but to contact people and let them know that you would like to be a part of this little soiree. Basically, speak up instead of feeling sorry for yourself.
It is so much better to take control and advocate for your self than to sit and do the “Poor me” thing! It is empowering and strengthening rather than feeling bad and weak and unwanted.
And one more thing, I love this! My sister sent me this video of Oprah, so, so, so empowering. I must share it with my blogger friends and readers!