Wow, now I understand why Kelly Clarkson is always emotional and always singing about men leaving her. I had no idea she’d been abandoned by her father. These emotions cut close to my heart as well. Does it ever end? You can read a ton of books on how to heal your inner child, on how to tame your outer child, on how to become a Buddist nun (haha not really) on how to do EMDR, on how to get over PTSD, and on and on and on. You can be in counseling, exercise, take your meds, but then you hear something like this and the hole in your heart (the figurative one not the real one lol) gets bigger. Are you forever destined to be in pain, broken, irreparable? If once you’ve been broken, can you never glue yourself together again? Like the proverbial Humpty Dumpty? Very powerful song and very powerful emotions, just finished exercising, going to take a shower and be calm and ok.
Posts
ZUMBA! The most effective antidepressant ever! 😊
I absolutely love Zumba! It’s an absolute tonic, a balm, a lifter for my mood.
Fear is everywhere, it is anger, it is anxiety, it is hopelessness and so much more. How do we help ourselves overcome it?
Fear is everywhere, it is anger, anxiety, hopelessness. It is a primal emotion which has helped us survive, evolutionarily. But now our fear response can be triggered because of non urgent events. And we can react by getting angry, getting anxious, having all the negative emotions. It activates our fight or flight or freeze response. We can become habituated to feel fear, anger, anxious, hopeless, etc, etc. And we try to get away from these emotions, we run away from them.But that doesn’t work. What do we do about it? We accept it, we sit with it in meditation. Every time we feel fear and anger means we have hit a boundary in our life. Meaning fear is at the outer limit of what is acceptable to us. We have reached our limits. And we experience fear. We can sit with it, we can push against it and this is growth. When we reach out outer edges, we can either be fearful, or we can accept the fear and push back, and that is where growth happens for us. So as frightening as fear, anger, anxiety are, they are the catalysts for our own growth!
Keep listening, she’s really good!
Is Good Really Stronger Than Evil?

Hmmm, according to this article, after doing a good deed, your strength increases! But your strength increases after you do a bad deed as well. So it’s up to us to choose wisely.
Fiction abounds with incredible feats of strength. In the real world, too, strangers and neighbors perform incredibly physical acts—lifting cars off babies, raising fallen trees off trapped victims. Is it all adrenaline rush or is something else going on?
Harvard psychologist Kurt Gray thinks he’s figured out a key ingredient to feats of extraordinary strength in the real world. After a few simple experiments, (link is external)Gray concluded that moral activity has a distinct, measurable effect on people’s capacity for physical endurance and strength—he calls it “moral transformation.”
To put it to the test, Gray measured the physical strength and endurance of test subjects before and after they contributed to charity. After their charitable act, the test subjects were stronger and their physical endurance greater: Each was able to hold weights and hand grips longer than before their philanthropic contribution.
Not all tales are clear-cut good vs. evil. In fiction, as in real life, villains have power, too. And Gray’s theory of moral transformation most certainly has a dark side. In addition to testing the morally transformative power of “good” or charitable acts, Gray had test subjects scribble tales of doing harm to another human being. These “wicked” test subjects exhibited just as much higher strength and physical endurance as the “kind” group, leading Gray to conclude:
People perceive those who do good and evil to have more efficacy, morewillpower, and less sensitivity to discomfort. By perceiving themselves as good or evil, people embody these perceptions, actually becoming more capable of physical endurance.
The lesson for all of us is to use our power wisely. Being kind and being cruel empower us, and it’s up to us to make the right choice. At the very least, help out a stranger or give a dollar to someone in need on the way to the gym—not only will the world be a better place, but you’ll have a better workout.
Hugh’s Weekly Photo Challange: Week 17 – Calm

A lake in Brandenburg KY. A beautiful calm day with a canoe.

A filly in the Churchill Downs stable. She was so sweet and let me get so close to her, a lovely horse!
For World Bipolar Day
Jockey Jim
Recolor 😊
I colored these on an app called recolor. I think I have fallen in love with coloring all over again. At first it seemed tedious, but by the time I was done with the 2nd one I did, the flower bouquet in a vase, I was amazed and very happy with myself and the beautiful thing I’d created. It’s really fun! I’m planning on doing lots more.
Don’t Let Foot Cramps and Charley Horses Slow You Down
Sort of a banal post, but probably helpful as well. These cramps in my feet happen to me all the time as a result of being on Lithium. Lithium dehydrates you and if you don’t rehydrate enough, you can get muscle cramps. Also lithium changes your electrolyte balance and that can also cause muscle cramps. I try, always, to drink a lot of fluids, sometimes, I don’t hydrate enough and I get cramps. I saw this article and thought i am surely not the only one that that happens to, so I’m posting it. Pretty informational 🙂
You’re sound asleep, and then, without warning, you wake up with a paralyzing stiffness in your calf or foot.
Whether you call it a foot or leg cramp (aka “charley horse”), it’s a common, somewhat mysterious pain that happens when a muscle gets involuntarily stiff and can’t relax.
“They tend to happen more frequently as we age,” says sports and exercise medicine physician Kim Gladden, MD. “While they can be uncomfortable, they are rarely harmful.”
Here’s what causes these cramps, as well as tips to help prevent them.
7 common causes for cramps
Whether day or night, your foot and calf muscles can spasm or cramp. This can happen to various muscles — not just in the legs or feet — though these cramps are often most uncomfortable.
Causes for muscle cramps include:
- Lack of hydration.“If you are experiencing cramping, it’s important to look at your hydration first,” Dr. Gladden says. You want to make sure you are drinking enough water throughout the day.
- Problems with nutrition. While a balance of electrolytes (calcium, sodium, potassium, and magnesium) is essential for the contraction and relaxation of a muscle, it’s best not to simply self-treat with supplements. “Taking excess supplements if you don’t need them can be harmful,” Dr. Gladden says. Instead, she suggests eating a variety of foods with plenty of colorful fruits and vegetables. This includes leafy greens and fruits, including bananas, to add a balance of electrolytes to you diet.
- Side effect of medication. Some medications such as statins and furosemide (Lasix®) can also cause muscle cramps. A tip-off is when cramps start suddenly after you begin taking a new medication. If this happens, see your practitioner.
- Not stretching enough. Taking time to stretch each day, including after a brief warm up or after a shower can help. “You want your muscles to be as strong and supple as they can be. Adequate stretching after a brief warm-up period is key to this,” Dr. Gladden says.
- Overexertion. If you exercise harder than usual or experience muscle fatigue, this can cause cramps. Pace yourself.
- Poor circulation. If you have cramping that increases when you walk, it could be a problem with your circulation. “Some circulation problems cause pain that feels like cramping. If it gets worse when you walk, or if you have cramps that just don’t stop, definitely see your doctor,” Dr. Gladden says.
- The wrong shoes. A less-known cause for muscle cramping: your shoes. “You want to look at your shoes, especially if you changed from flats to heels. This also can cause cramps,” Dr. Gladden says.
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How to stop leg and foot cramps
There are some simple ways to respond to leg and foot cramps:
- If it happens while you are lying down or in bed, try to simply stand up and put some weight on the affected leg or foot. This can sometimes be enough to stop that tender stiffness.
- Use warmth/heating pads to increase blood circulation to the muscle and to relax it. Soaking in a warm tub of Epsom salt can also help ease the tension.
- For more stubborn pain, you can try a non-steroidal anti-inflammatory medication, such as ibuprofen.
Easy stretches to keep calves and feet happy
Here are some simple stretches that can help stop pain and prevent it.
Basic calf stretch
This calf stretch is commonly used by runners. Here’s how to do it:
- Stand with your palms placed against a wall, with arms stretched out
- Step back with leg of affected calf
- Lean forward on the other leg and push against the wall
You should feel a stretch in your calf muscle and the back of the leg.
Towel stretch
Do this stretch while you sit:
- Keep legs outstretched in front of you
- Point the toes of your affected foot at the ceiling so that the leg is engaged
- Take a towel or neck tie and wrap it around your foot, holding it with both hands
- Lift the leg slightly until you feel a good stretch
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Keep cramps from happening again
Here are some tips to prevent leg cramps:
- Stay well hydrated
- Stretch each day, especially before you exercise
- Limit or avoid alcohol
- Eat a balanced diet that includes natural sources of calcium, potassium and magnesium
- Increase your activity level gradually
If leg or foot cramps are occasional occurrences, you can generally manage them yourself. However, if they happen frequently, are severe, or if you are concerned any of your medications are the culprit, talk to your doctor. They could signal a medical problem that requires treatment.
A Spotless Mind: Good or Bad?
Would you erase traumatic and bad memories, phobias, panic attacks and disorders such as PTSD if you could? Well now with Propranolol you can!
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/minding-memory/201603/spotless-mind-good-or-bad?utm_source=FacebookPost&utm_medium=FBPost&utm_campaign=FBPostAntonio Guillem/Shutterstock
Source: Antonio Guillem/Shutterstock
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to delete a painful memory—just obliterate it?
Maybe you saw the movie Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (link is external)(2004), one of the wackier products of writer Charlie Kaufman’s imagination. Its premise was that people could erase selective memories to eliminate the distress they incur.
I loved the film. I found it funny, absurd, and profoundly moving. What its protagonists (Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet) perceive is that not only do they cling to their most difficult memories but they also tend to repeat their past mistakes, even as they forget the life lessons they believe to have learned from them. It’s like Groundhog Day (link is external)(1993) with a realistic twist.
But guess what? Scientists have discovered a drug that can potentially efface memories of profoundly painful, even traumatic events. As Richard A. Friedman wrote in the New York Times: “Who among us hasn’t wanted to let go of anxiety or forget about fear? Phobias, panic attacks and disorders like post-traumatic stress are extremely common: 29 percent of American adults will suffer from anxiety at some point in their lives.”
Well, there may be a cure for that. And its name is propranolol.
Studies show that if someone who has a phobia—let’s say spiders—takes this drug at the moment they are exposed to that fear, it vanishes. Friedman (link is external)explains the process:
“Propranolol blocks the effects of norepinephrine in the brain. This chemical, which is similar to adrenaline, enhances learning, so blocking it disrupts the way a memory is put back in storage after it is retrieved—a process called reconsolidation.”
Things get a lot trickier in Spotless Mind, in which both protagonists undergo an all-night brain treatment to erase the memory of their failed relationship. The problem is that the treatment works. Both come to regret their decision to erase the memories of each other and scramble to recover them. Despite the painfulness of their parting, neither wants to let go of the bittersweet memory of their intimate involvement. Call it love.
Fear of spiders seems relatively minor in relation to human heartbreak. But think also about the epidemic of post-traumatic stress disorder in recent years—not only among veterans returning from war but also among those (many of them women) who have suffered sexual and/or domestic abuse on the homefront.
We are hyper-sensitized to stories of trauma and their disabling effects. We hear that survivors are subject to recurring nightmares, panic attacks resulting from “triggers,” social isolation, depression and suicidal impulses.
I do not doubt any of these findings. Rather, I think that these stories may help to deepen our understanding and appreciation of the complex (and barely understood) processes of memory.
Contemporary neuroscience tells us that every time we retrieve and relive a personal memory, we revise it in terms of the context of its retrieval. Say you hear a song that reminds you of a moment of special significance in your past. The instant in which you recall this memory intermingles with the circumstance that evoked it. As a result, the reminiscence that will now be re-stored in your long-term memory will bear traces of what is happening here and now. The present, as a result, continues to revise the past. This is not a matter of personal choice or self-determination. It’s a brain function that happens regardless of what we consciously wish or desire.
I wonder if the success of exposure therapy (an offshoot of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) may work in part like this. I’ve never tried this technique. But I can imagine how reliving a traumatic experience (such as a rape) in a controlled environment, where you can summon a response other than helplessness and terror, might help form new associations about what happened. It may mute the primary memory’s traumatic effects. I can also see how this therapy might not be enough. Friedman reports that it works in only about half of the PTSD patients who try it. Some may even experience the re-living of the past as an excruciating replay of the original trauma.
I’m torn about these new findings. Would I want to erase the most painful memories of my past—nearly all of which have to do with close relationships? Like the lovers in Spotless Mind, the memories that most torment me concern the major emotional losses of my life. Would I want to erase these?
I do not mind the prospect of taking a federally-approved drug to enhance my health, longevity, or emotional well-being (e.g., high blood pressure, migraine, anxiety or depression). But I don’t like the idea of losing my personal memory, as one does because of Alzheimers or dementia. For me, the most difficult memories are also the ones that have propelled me into the future. Experiencing disappointment or failure, even in personal relationships, has caused me to develop a more complex understanding of myself and others. It has allowed me to discover greater inner resources.
For example: When I once lost a job, I got so mad that I demanded to meet with the president of the college. This didn’t save my job, but it did teach me to be more assertive. I treasure this memory as much as I value the ones that revealed to me how I “messed up” with spouses, lovers, and friends. How else would I learn what matters?
I don’t seek the solace of a spotless mind—that is to say, one in which I may forget the most challenging, but also most life-changing, events of my life.
What about you? Would you take such a drug? For what reasons?

